


What Remains

by Igirisuhito



Series: Despair Naegi AU [2]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa Zero, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Brain Fucking, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Despair Matsuda Yasuke, Despair Naegi Makoto, Dubious Consent, Getting lobotomised by a dick, M/M, Non-Consensual Electroconvulsive Therapy, Seizures, Unsafe Medical Practice, Vivisection, gut fucking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:01:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25746301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Igirisuhito/pseuds/Igirisuhito
Summary: Naegi takes an interest in some of Matsuda's self-destructive hobbies.
Relationships: Kamukura Izuru/Matsuda Yasuke, Kamukura Izuru/Matsuda Yasuke/Naegi Makoto, Kamukura Izuru/Naegi Makoto, Matsuda Yasuke/Naegi Makoto
Series: Despair Naegi AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1867654
Comments: 10
Kudos: 41





	What Remains

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> This fic was written as part of a small rarepair exchange between friends. My partner was Doki, with the prompt Kamuegi brain-fucking.
> 
> I recommend reading the previous fic in this series, Precaution, As it will clear up some confusion surrounding this AU.
> 
> And if you haven't really read the tags, go back.

"Matsuda-senpaaaaai."

Despite Naegi's whine, Matsuda neglected to look up from the task before him. "Well if it isn't Becky and Lucy. What are you apes doing in here? Don't you two have something better to do, like, I dunno, fuck my girlfriend?" 

There was a short silence as Kamukura averted his gaze from Matsuda, instead focusing on the deft movements of the other's hands. Calculated and precise. Thin, pale fingers taped numerous electrodes to a patient's head, unbothered by how much the woman jolted and squirmed beneath them. It was as if the neurologist's every touch burned her. 

"Haha, you know I don't really have any interest in doing that, Matsuda-senpai." Casually sauntering over to where Matsuda stood, Naegi looked over the situation with a childish curiosity sparkling in his eyes. "What are you planning to do to this patient? Shock therapy?" 

The lady screamed and squirmed again, biting down hard on the gag and pulling against the leather restraints. This seemed to annoy Matsuda, as he sighed quite dramatically. 

"I plan on testing exactly how much voltage it would take to either fry her brain completely or cause her to seizure so badly it quit communicating with her vital organs." He spoke without a drop of sympathy in his voice. If anything, he sounded more dejected and bored, as if doing this kind of thing was a chore to him. "Whichever comes first."

The woman screamed again, Matsuda responded by sliding his fingers over the electrodes on her forehead, over the crown of her head, then down the back of it. His fingers carefully wrapped around her neck, digging hard into her skin and restricting the airway enough to make her choke and gasp. 

He leaned in close to her ear, speaking rather softly as he did so. "I don't think freakish pigs like you have any right to be squealing like that."

Matsuda held her there for another few seconds, allowing the message to sink in, before he released his grip and left her to fall limply against the chair. 

As Naegi looked over the woman’s body, a grin slowly began to grow wider on his face. “Wow, that sounds amazing Matsuda-senpai! Would you mind if we watched?”

“Knock yourself out, just don’t get in my way, you creep.”

With that, Naegi gleefully plopped himself down on the floor, crossing his legs as he stared up at the woman. She stared right back at him, a sense of confusion and fear swirling in her eyes as she attempted to understand exactly why _Naegi Makoto; hostage of the Remnants of Despair_ , would ever _want_ to watch her be tortured. 

The sense of despair his presence brought her made things interesting. Naegi giggled to himself before giving her a friendly wave of approval. 

Kamukura, who had been hanging around by the doorway, was finally at ease. They had been granted permission into Matsuda's sanctum, which meant he wouldn't have to bother trying to avoid flying scalpels and dull insults being hurled his way. 

With this newfound ease, he wandered over to where Naegi sat, before lowering himself down to the floor and curling up beside the other. He positioned his head firmly in the centre of Naegi's lap, letting out a pleased hum as the younger boy stroked his fingers into his hair. 

"Ugh, when did you train him to become your personal lapdog?” Screwing up his nose, Matsuda glared down at the two of them. “I feel like I’m watching two chūnibyōs get together. It’s disturbing how well they get along, if not a little endearing. But what I anticipate the most is the messy breakup where one of them finally kills the other.”

Naegi giggled again, running his fingers over Kamukura's scar as he threaded them back into his hair. "Are you jealous, Matsuda-senpai? Because your childhood love is gone now?" 

There was no comment from Matsuda, just the loud flick of a switch accompanied by a quiet electrical hum. The woman began to scream and struggle again, but only had a few seconds before a dial was turned and the shock ran strong through her body. 

She convulsed violently, her body rising from the seat and pulling against the restraints as she screamed in pain. It barely lasted for a second, before Matsuda turned the dial again and she collapsed against the chair, muscles weak and eyes closed. 

"Oh, that was no fun at all… she's already unconscious." Huffing, Naegi tugged tightly on Kamukura's hair. 

When Matsuda failed to acknowledge his complaints, appearing to be too absorbed in his work. Or his anger, it was difficult to tell. 

Thus, Kamukura provided an explanation. "Electroconvulsive Therapy is brief, used to induce a seizure. I believe Matsuda has forgotten that he's torturing somebody, not treating them."

Matsuda's face contorted into a snarl. "I know what I'm fucking doing."

The woman once again writhed violently, her muscles spasming as she pulled against the restraints. Her head smacked against the chair quite aggressively as her fists clenched and unclenched repeatedly. 

"You're indulging in the deluded fantasy that you're still a doctor." Stating this in a very matter-of-fact tone, Kamukura snuggled closer to Naegi. "Carefully tending to a patient's wounds before brutally killing them. Attempting to cure a woman of her psychosis before toying with her unconscious body. It's obviously a bizarre coping mechanism used to help you grieve over Enoshima's betrayal, and her subsequent death. Doing the same things she did to you."

The woman groaned loudly as the muscles in her bladder gave out, causing her to wet herself and soak her shorts. Naegi watched excitedly, eyes focused closely on the liquid dripping down her leg. He remained completely oblivious to the argument going on in front of him. 

"Shut up, shut the fuck up you irritating bastard! Don't use your worthless fake talents on me, don't fucking analyse me!" 

Pale fingers reached for the dial again, twisting it aggressively. For a second the lights flickered, as the building's power was reallocated, but once the electricity hit, the sound was incredible. Pure music to Naegi's ears. 

The way she howled, he couldn't tear his attention away. You could hear the muscles in her throat spasm as she continued to scream, and it was a horrific scream, the one that a person made when they _knew_ they were going to die. 

"Because I remind you of her?" 

The woman retched violently, still shrieking in pain as she vomited past the gag. Whatever pathetic meal she had last ate dripped down her chin and stained her shirt, much to Naegi's ever growing glee. 

"No, it's because you're a fucking nuisance!"

The woman choked violently, nearly rocking the chair with how much she was spasming. Every time her eyelids twitched open, Naegi could see how far rolled back her eyes were, to the point they were just whites boasting popped vessels. The contrasting colour was quite gorgeous. 

Finally, Matsuda submitted, flicking the switch of the machine off. The woman collapsed immediately, unconscious and not breathing. Naegi gasped, bundling up two fistfuls of Kaumukura’s hair and pulling tightly in his ecstasy. 

His eyes were practically sparkling as he gazed up at Matsuda. “That was amazing, Matsuda-senpai! A little short-lived, but every moment was so cool! The way her body convulsed, It was just _beautiful_!” 

Matsuda snorted. “Of course you enjoyed that, you sick puppy. You’d probably enjoy it if I stood here and did the very same thing to you.”

“Hehe.” The soft giggle made Matsuda grimace. "You're so amazing Matsuda-senpai! I wanna know how to mess with people's brains like you do!" 

Letting go of Kamukura’s hair, Naegi placed his hands down onto the floor beside him. Taking the hint that he wanted to get up, Kamukura shifted his weight off of Naegi and sat up, watching the boy closely as he proceeded to rise from his cross-legged position and up to his feet.

There was such joy in Naegi’s movements, that one could almost think he was skipping over to the body. He leant in close, carefully examining the woman’s horrified expression. "Are you sure she's--”

"She's dead.” Matsuda cut down the question before it could even be asked. “Even Cousin Itt over there wouldn't have survived that much fucking with his brain" 

"Fucking with his brain…" Naegi paused for a moment, slowly turning to look at Kamukura, who had since stood up and moved closer to observe him. 

Those empty red eyes stared right back at him, burning into him a familiar sensation of curiosity, apathy, a desire to tear things limb from limb. Matsuda had been inside Kamukura’s head, he had felt and messed with specific parts of his brain with a precise hand, intentionally sullying him in ways that would leave his life dull and unfulfilling, an existence of nothingness. A life of pure despair.

But it never was just about the surgeries, because if it were, then he was in just as much of a sad state as Kamukura. Oh no, it was about the talents that made everything too easy, and the stress testing of those talents that made them traumatising. The torture that the steering committee forced him to undergo, that Matsuda overlooked and even occasionally assisted in. Assaulting him and forcing him to patch himself up, forcing him to write essays for days on end until he eventually collapsed from exhaustion, waterboarding him to the brink of death, then bringing him back with a choking gasp.

And Kamukura took all of it, because it was what he was made to do. He was made to be a subservient tool to be messed with. It was horrifying, yet so incredibly beautiful. Kamukura Izuru truly was a work of art. Naegi considered how it would feel to destroy such a beautiful piece. 

A wide grin spread across his face. "May I try?" 

“You wanna shock someone?” Matsuda began to undo the restraints on the woman, not even turning to look at Naegi. “Even if I said no, you’d still do it. So I’ll help you so you don't break my machines. Then, what kind of person do you want to drag in here? I’m not going to go get them for you so you’re gonna have to--”

“Kamukura.” Naegi’s assertive tone cut him short, making Matsuda flinch. “You’ve done it before, I want to know what it’s like to get in Kamukura’s head.”

Both Kamukura and Matsuda looked at him in confusion, Kamukura tipping his head to the side whilst Matsuda screwed up his face as if he saw something truly horrid. 

“Why? There’s nothing special in there. In fact, he’s such a dumb asshole that if I hadn’t seen his awful brain in his stupid fucking skull I probably wouldn’t even believe he had one.” Spitting his usual array of colourful insults, Matsuda glanced Kamukura’s way. “Seriously, I’m truly boggled. How badly did that bitch fuck up your lobotomy? Do you even have brain function?”

Matsuda, still in his state of disbelief, had to stop undoing the woman’s restraints in order to lean against the chair dramatically, acting as if failing to do so would lead to him collapsing. 

“Seriously, is it a brain you want? I can get you a brain. Do you just want to torture someone? Why him? Why not literally anyone else less boring? I’m forced to see that god awful mistake everyday and you want me to look into his head cavity and look at every way in which he turned himself into a mistake?” He began to seem distressed, running a hand through his hair in order to pull his bangs back. “Is what you want to do kill him? Is this how you finally plan to put down that tortured animal, by destroying the most corrupted part of him?”

After waiting for Matsuda to get out his full ramble, Naegi shook his head and smiled up at him. “I don’t plan to kill him. I just would like to feel him in my hands, his entire personality and all of his talents! Doesn’t that sound nice? Wouldn’t you have liked to have held Junko-chan in your hands?”

“I would not have.” Matsuda spat. ”You plan to torture him too, right? You want to poke and prod at his brain and see what happens. I saw how you practically sparkled when that chick pissed herself, you want complete agency over him. I get it, but you know you can do that shit even without…”

He trailed off, gesturing vaguely as if he couldn’t find the words. “Cracking open his skull and going to town?”

“There’s no point in trying to understand it, Matsuda.” The sudden voice behind them caused Matsuda to jump, and Naegi to look up gleefully. “He wants to see something new, he enjoys witnessing me make _‘unusual expressions’_.”

Matsuda blinked back at Kamukura. “So, obviously, you’re okay with this. Being aware of the risks, you’re fine with having this little psychopath take your brain into his grubby little hands?”

“Of course. Enoshima did leave me to take care of him, this is part of that job.” Stating that so bluntly, Kamukura narrowed his eyes at the other. “You are jealous that Enoshima left you with nothing but a hole in your gut?”

“Jesus when did you become such a snarky cunt?" Snorting to himself, Matsuda pinched his brow in order to force back a looming headache." I’d much rather have a hole than _another_ braindead pet.” 

“That is a lie.”

“Shut up.” Matsuda snapped. “Fine, yeah, I’ll fucking do it. The sooner you’re dead the better I’ll feel.”

Rushing up to Matsuda, Naegi threw his arms around the much taller man and squeezed him tight. “Ah! Thank you Matsuda-kun! You truly are amazing!”

“I’m your senpai, remember? Don’t call me that.” Grumbling, Matsuda gripped Naegi’s head and attempted to push him away. “You’re like a fucking dog, get off me.”

He, however, did not. 

Seeing the two preoccupied with yelling and pulling one another’s 

hair, Kamukura decided to busy himself with removing the woman’s corpse from the chair. As he hoisted her lifeless body over his shoulder, he couldn't help but wonder if it was he who was going to be the lifeless body in the chair in a few hours.

…

He didn’t think he’d mind that, not if he was dying at Naegi’s hands.  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  


Waking up was an interesting experience for Kamukura.

That’s the kind of thing he was seeking, an interesting experience. And to have woken up, bitten his lip, then immediately started sobbing, was an interesting experience. Especially when Kamukura had never cried like this before in his life.

He felt as though he was being held partially underwater. Everything was vaguely dreamy and he was sleepy, yet the world was so clear at the same time. Reminiscent of a lucid dream, where the actions felt real, but weren’t actually happening. 

Except they were, and he was sobbing. Tears and snot dripped down his face as Naegi knelt down in front of him, cocking his head to the side and staring with a rather inquisitive look on his face. 

“You’re crying Kamukura-senpai!” He carefully took Kamukura’s face into his hands, wiping the tears off his cheeks with his thumbs. “You look so beautiful right now! I wish Koizumi-senpai was here to take a photo.”

Kamukura sniffed loudly, trying to suppress the sobs that wracked his body violently. “It- it _hurts_.”

“Aw, shucks. Anaesthesia is hard to come by these days, I’m not fucking wasting it all on an antisocial dick like you.” A gruff voice came from behind him and Naegi had to stop Kamukura from turning his head. “If you want painkillers, you can have a couple of Tramadol. Oh wait, you’re allergic to those aren’t you? That’s unfortunate.” 

For some reason he didn’t quite understand, Kamukura started to sob even harder. Naegi hushed him, pressing a quick kiss to the other boy’s lips. Matsuda’s only response was to snort to himself.

In a show of sympathy, Naegi wiped some of the blood off Kamukura’s forehead with his sleeve. “It’s okay, Kamukura-senpai. You can fight through it. Are you uncomfortable? Are the restraints too tight?”

Nodding made Kamukura feel even more dizzy, but he couldn’t rely on his voice whilst crying like this. Naegi hummed in acknowledgment, taking a moment to adjust the leather restraints on Kamukura’s wrists to be as tight as he could tug them.  
  
When Kamukura stared at him with a confused look, he simply smiled that signature bright smile of his. “We wouldn’t want you getting away, would we?”

Swallowing hard, Kamukura nodded again. There was a strange feeling of dread rising in his chest with each passing second, and even as he slowly stopped crying. He wondered if he may have felt better if he kept doing it.

But he needed to be strong, for Naegi’s sake.

He cleared his throat before speaking again. “Wh-Where’s Matsuda?” 

“Matsuda-senpai? He’s just laying down over there, reading…” Naegi turned his head, looking past Kamukura and squinting. “ _Summoning your sexier demon self to make out with you_?”

“You have no grounds to judge my taste, I’ve seen what you have sex with.” Matsuda spat in retaliation, seemingly defensive of his strange porn.

“Of course! I would never judge you, Matsuda-senpai!”

“That’s your problem, not mine, you cheery freak.”

Naegi laughed a little to himself before turning back to Kamukura. “Well, if you’re feeling better now Kamukura-senpai, should we start?”

“Yes.” A drop of sweat (blood?) rolled down Kamukura’s forehead, and he paused momentarily. “I am now completely in your hands, Naegi. Please show me something new.”

“Thank you, Kamukura-senpai.” Pressing a quick kiss to the other’s forehead, Naegi rose to his feet. “I will make sure to fulfil your wish!”

He stepped out of Kamukura's line of sight, but Kamukura could still hear the footsteps behind him. Naegi slowly approached the back of the chair, before taking the corner of the tarpaulin covering Kamukura's head into his hand and pulling it back. 

He gasped, taking in the sight in all its glory. It wasn't the first brain he had seen, but definitely one of the most in-tact ones. And knowing that this was Kamukura, all of his talents and brilliance, made it such a glorious sight. 

"Oh Kamukura-senpai," Naegi stroked his fingers delicately over the ridges of the other's brain, as if he were petting a small animal. "You're just as perfect on the inside."

There was no reaction from Kamukura, after all, he couldn't feel anything. The only means of which he could tell Naegi was touching him was from the soft wet sounds of squishing flesh and blood. It was a familiar sound, just one so strange to hear from his own body. 

Though, he would be lying if he said this was the first time he'd allowed Naegi into him like this. Ever since the luckster had succumbed to despair he had been entranced by bodily harm, by the concept of tearing another or oneself open. Allowing his luck to decide on whether or not he was going to make it through. 

He did, however. He always did. Thus, the game quickly became boring. 

So he took to opening others up. Random civilians Naegi lured in by pretending to be a wounded survivor, a lost victim. He played the part well, always having an uncanny ability to bring people close to him. As soon as they were in range he would serve as the distraction, awaiting Kamukura to knock the person unconscious before dragging them back to their hideout.

He recalled the first time they had explored Naegi's gruesome curiosity rather intimately. They had kidnapped a young man, perhaps in his 30s, to experiment on. Naegi had opted to simply watch, occasionally telling Kamukura what he desired him to do. His orders had been simple, create a vivisection whilst the patient remains conscious. 

He'd gotten to work immediately after the patient had awoken, slicing his skin open neatly from the bottom of his sternum all the way down to his groin. The blood-curdling screams rang throughout his mind for weeks, along with the sound of leather restraints rubbing harshly against skin and the repulsive smell of iron that filled the air. 

Every time he pinned a piece of skin back, the patient begged for Kamukura to kill him. Naegi merely cooed, telling the patient how beautiful his organs were on full display whilst they were still functioning away, writhing and pulsating as if their effort wasn't about to be ruled completely worthless. 

The more Kamukura opened up, the more blood spilled from his body, the weaker the screams became.

By the time he was finished, the patient’s heart had stilled. Most of his organs had begun to drain of their rich red colour as more blood left them. Naegi looked most disappointed with the fact his subject hadn’t survived the operation, those puppy eyes always tore away at Kamukura’s heartstrings. 

The disappointed feeling only became greater as Naegi began to tear the man apart, pulling out his organs one by one in a fit of despair. Cackling to himself as he sunk his teeth into his still-warm heart, spilling blood down his shirt and all over his mouth. Kamukura observed in earnest, watching closely as the sound of ripping fresh and despaired laughter filled the room.

When Naegi came to consider himself content with his destruction, having completely ruined the neat display Kamukura had laid out, he settled down in the centre of his mess. Suit, hair, and cheeks bloodied as he wore the most horrified look on his face. It was an expression Kamukura could remember well.

“I’m sorry… Izuru.” Naegi’s voice was worn from laughing and screaming, sounding almost as if he were on the verge of tears.

Such was a side effect with these despair spirals, Naegi never acted like himself upon coming out the other side. Always full of regret, apologies, and melancholy.

Kamukura knelt down before him, taking Naegi’s face into his hands. Blood smeared onto his fingers as he silently brought his face closer, delicately planting his lips against the others. His lips tasted bitter, of iron and salt, but Kamukura kept kissing him, prying Naegi’s mouth open and softly licking at his tongue. 

He continued this until Naegi eventually returned the gesture, soft kisses turning into ravenous and desperate biting of lips and flesh. Until they were hastily pulling off one another’s clothes, ruining their suits in favour of ruining each other. 

“Hhhgh!” 

Kamukura’s body violently spasmed as Naegi pressed his fingers hard into his brain, pulling him from his pleasant recollection. 

“Oh! Did you feel that, Kamukura-senpai?” With a soft giggle, Naegi leaned in close and pressed a soft kiss to the wet flesh. “You’re so delicate like this, I could tear you apart completely.”

Kamukura swallowed, attempting to halt the twitching and shivering of his muscles. “I- I could not feel it, for the brain lacks nerve endings.” 

“I know! But I was hoping that perhaps the power of love would be able to help you feel it!” With a disappointed sigh, Naegi pulled his mouth away. He made no acknowledgement of Matsuda’s humoured snort. “Oh well, perhaps I’ll just have to be more forceful.”

“Yeah, more forceful.” A page turned audibly. “Stick an ice-pick in the fucker’s head and he’ll still come out the other side. Might as well put your dick in here and scramble his brains, the bastard just refuses to die.”

There was a momentary pause of complete silence, then a wet squelch as Naegi ran his hands over Kamukura’s brain.

“Oi.”

He splayed his hands over the crown, digging the tips of his fingers harshly into Kamukura’s frontal lobe. The man beneath him gasped and twitched, his eyes lolling back into his head briefly. Kamukura made a sound reminiscent of an expression of confusion, a sound Naegi had yet to hear from him before.

“You aren’t genuinely considering fucking his brain, are you?”

Matsuda’s words fell on deaf ears, Naegi now too caught up in his own thoughts to even register his actions. He released his grip, bringing his bloody fingers to his lips and sliding them onto his tongue. 

The manga snapped shut. 

“You’re disgusting, revolting, psychotic.” 

Matsuda pulled himself off the operating table he had been laying down on, ditching the book as he quickly stomped across the room.

“Shameless, deranged, sickening.”

He grabbed the rolling chair from his desk dragging it behind him as he strode up to the chair Kamukura was strapped to.

“Vile, depraved, a pure _degenerate_.”

He threw himself into the chair, stamping his feet down to ensure it didn't roll back with the sudden force. He sat up, watching Kamukura intently as he shivered and breathed heavily.

“Hurry up and get on with it. I wanna see what happens.” Matsuda snapped in finality.

Processing the words, Naegi blinked a few times. “Oh! Right, of course.”

As the younger boy began undoing his belt, Kamukura stuttered out a few weak words. “W-Were you not r-repulsed by gore, M-Matsuda?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” With a loud click of his tongue, Matsuda crossed one leg over the other. “What use would a Neurologist have if he were repulsed by gore?"

Kamukura’s response was to simply blink in confusion, his breaths beginning to slow as he recovered from the shock. He chose not to question it, it had never been wise to question Matsuda.

There was a loud sigh of relief as Naegi pulled his cock from his underwear, already half hard in his hand. Blood smeared across the skin as he jerked himself with an excited smile on his face.

"You look like a kid on Christmas." Near laughing, Matsuda stood up again. "Except nobody's home and two unsuspecting robbers are about to fall victim to your psychopathy." 

Despite not really knowing what Matsuda was talking about, Naegi laughed at his joke. He was more focused on bringing himself to full mast, and the fact that even on his tip-toes, he couldn't quite rest his dick on top of Kamukura's head. 

Matsuda must have noticed this, since he was suddenly beside him with a small stepping stool. Naegi, too caught up in the excitement, didn't even have the ability to be embarrassed, he just shufftled back and allowed Matsuda to put it down before he stepped onto it. 

Ah yes, this was much better. 

Grabbing Kamukura's head with both hands, he gently slid his cock along the groove between the two hemispheres of his brain. Erupting into a fit of excited giggles, Naegi leaned down over Kamukura's head until the world was upside-down and his hair fell. 

"Hey, Kamukura-senpai. Does this feel good? Do you remember the last time I fucked you like this?" 

Kamukura did. He remembered it well. 

"I do." He stated matter-of-factly.

Bored with cutting himself open and testing his luck, Naegi prompted Kamukura to do it himself. An experiment, one to test who's luck was superior. 

The answer was already obvious, but Kamukura humoured him. He cut himself open from beneath his sternum to his bellybutton, exposing his intestines. It was exhausting, made him feel unbearably ill and hot. 

Naegi had gushed over the way he looked. The paling of his face, Kamukura's deep breathing, the shaking as he reached for the surgical needle to sew himself up. 

But Naegi couldn't let it end there. He needed to see more of those beautiful expressions. He forced his fingers into the wound, making the other gasp in pain. Kamukura sat obediently, allowing him to finger open his guts, biting his tongue so as to not vomit from the strange sensation.

He remembered distinctly laying back on the floor, hand over his mouth as Naegi giggled and played with his insides. The pain and sensation was like nothing he had felt before, which was interesting. He started to enjoy it more and more, even with the threat of rising bile.

Naegi noticed his enjoyment, and took things a step further. Kamukura was able to keep his vomit down until Naegi thrust his cock into his guts.

He heaved onto the floor beside him, eyes going blurry and unfocused from the tears and searing pain. It burned as Naegi fucked into his intestines over and over again, cackling to himself all the while. He never made it all the way through, but he's certain that Naegi came in him, that that cum is probably still in him...

Or, the more likely scenario, his body had absorbed it over time. But that wasn't as pleasant as the idea of having Naegi's semen all over his guts.

When he had awoken, Naegi had gotten him help. Tsumiki, unavailable whilst she attempted to retrieve Enoshima's corpse, would have been his first choice, but instead Naegi managed to convince Matsuda to sew Kamukura up and hook him up to a blood transfusion. 

Kamukura's near positive that there was some sort of exchange that day, especially when Matsuda was so unnerved by seeing Naegi's dick. He had always been rather fond of Enoshima's toy.

Naegi drew his hips back and forward again, moaning loudly as the head of his cock ran over the grooves of Kamukura's brain. 

This was fine, it was strange, but fine. 

"Kamukura-senpai, tell me you love me." 

This is how it always was with them, Kamukura fulfilled Naegi's desires. 

"I love you." 

And for his efforts, he got a little closer to understanding what Enoshima was so afraid of. 

"My name, say my name."

The psychopathy. 

"I love you, Naegi."

The ability to draw people in. 

"Makoto." 

The way he could control people.

"I love you, Makoto."

Naegi tilted his hips slightly, pressing his cock harder into the fleshy organ. Kamukura spasmed, clenching his fists tightly as he groaned. 

"Say it again." 

That was the thing about blind devotion. When it is offered so freely, it is normal for those feelings to be reciprocated. When somebody says they'll do anything for you, there is a natural desire to do the same for them. 

"I-I love you… M-Makoto…"

And it wasn't like Kamukura had anything to lose in devoting himself. 

"Keep saying it." 

It was only natural Naegi would eventually go back on his word, taking advantage of Kamukura's devotion for his own desires. 

"I l-love you Makoto." 

_Thrust_

"I l-ve you M-M-Makoto."

_Squish_

"I… ve y… Mak... hah…"

Kamukura twitched violently, his muscles continuing to contract and release as Naegi fucked his brain. He had no control over anything, he could barely speak. 

His ears were ringing, vision beginning to darken at the corners. He was sure Naegi was speaking, but everything sounded underwater. It was as if he was fading out from his own existence. 

Matsuda's piercing gaze stared back, analysing every reaction. His eyes kept darting down, a somewhat disgusted expression on his face. 

Oh… something felt… hot. 

It was much too late by the time Kamukura tried to weakly press his knees together. He could feel the warmth soak through his pants, drip down his legs. It was unpleasant, especially with someone watching him so closely. 

He almost felt like crying again. 

"Aww, Kamukura-senpai! You made a mess!" Giggling away to himself, Naegi thrust into Kamukura's brain again. "But it's okay, it wasn't your fault."

Kamukura could only moan in response, his eyes rolling back as his body became limp with exhaustion. "S-stop…"

"Come on Hinata, didn't I make you to be better than this?" Scooting closer, Matsuda gently took Kamukura's face into his hands. "Are you not cultivated of hope? Is this really all it takes to tear you apart?" 

A wheezy sound escaped Kamukura as he laughed softly. He could feel tears, maybe blood, maybe cerebrospinal fluid, maybe even Naegi's precome, _something_ dripping down his cheeks and face. Matsuda tenderly wiped it away, smiling bitterly as he stared down at him. 

"Th-this… uhnnlike… tsu- tsuda." Kamukura mumbled, despite the fact he was slurring to the point of incomprehension. 

"Is it really? I've always been disappointed in you." Matsuda chuckled softly to himself, letting go of Kamukura's face. "You remind me of everything I did wrong. Looking at you makes me want to throw up." 

"No, that's wrong." Piping up suddenly, Naegi grinned a cheery smile at the neurologist. "You love him just as much as I do, otherwise you never would have stepped in his head like I have."

"Pfft. You know, he's having a hard time breathing. If you don't stop now, he's going to die." Taking the time to very blatantly ignore Naegi's comment, Matsuda kept watching Kamukura closely. "Oh, yeah, he's having another seizure."

Kamukura gasped and twitched aggressively, as if he'd been shocked. Naegi responded by gripping the sides of his head tightly and fucking his brain harder. "I-I'm so close…" 

There was a strange taste on his tongue, like ashes, burning. Familiar, but out of place. Kamukura could just barely hear the squelching above the sound of his ears ringing, it was unbearably nauseating to the point that he would gag. His vision continued to tunnel and flicker darker and darker. He was going to die, he was finally going to die. 

"Oh Izuru-senpai!" 

_Where's Naegi?_

"You feel so warm, Izuru-senpai." 

"Ngh… Na-ehg…"

The fast paced rutting made Kamukura's brain feel as though it were melting, dripping down his forehead and from his ears. He knew in reality that it was likely just blood, but with every passing second, he became less and less sure. 

"I love you, Izuru-senpai!" 

Naegi's hips stuttered and faltered one final time as he pushed his cock into Kamukura's brain, reaching his climax with a loud gasp. Semen mixed with the blood shimmering on his brain as he groaned in relief.

Kamukura's turmoil, however, was far from over. Even after Naegi pulled his cock from his head, blood dripping from the shaft and staining his black suit pants, he was left to lay limply, eyes glazed over in near complete absence. 

He couldn't move, save for the occasional twitch of muscles. He wasn't even able to resist and Matsuda stepped up to him, prying his eye open with two fingers. 

"He's alive, just. But if you leave him like this he'll be completely useless, and in need of constant care." The way Matsuda spoke, it was as if he was no longer human, already dead. "I can make you a new toy, one that can actually take care of itself, if you would prefer?"

"Completely… useless?" Naegi's breathing was ragged, he sounded confused, lost. 

"Yeah, He's not coming back from this." Grabbing the back of his chair, Matsuda began to wheel it back to his desk, as if the show was over. "He'll never walk, talk or eat again. You're better off just finishing the job." 

Kamukura could taste iron on his lips. He moaned in pain. 

Stepping off the step, Naegi stared down at his bloodied hands. "I… I killed him?" 

"Aren't you listening? You hopeful moron." The chair was shoved violently into the desk. 

Naegi slowly brought his hands closer to his face, his fingers twisting into his hair as he tugged at the strands. "I killed him. I killed Kamukura Izuru."

"Yup."

He pulled harder, blood staining the light brown a dark red colour. It was becoming increasingly more difficult to breathe, his head was swimming with panic.  
  
“He- he’s still alive though.” Naegi stared wide eyed, watching Kamukura slowly blink. “I can still save him.”

Matsuda reached across his desk. “No, he’s dead. He’s basically an empty husk at this point, it would be more humane to kill him now before he has to suffer any more.”

“No…” Naegi pulled tighter at his hair. “No no no he’s okay. He can come back from this. He can’t just… _leave_ .”  
  
“No matter how perfect you think he is, he’s still human, Naegi.” Glancing over, Matsuda carefully watched as Naegi stared at Kamukura’s weakly moving body. “And when you destroy a person’s brain, they die. Is this not what you wanted?”

“N-no… I would never… I couldn’t I…”

The floor kept swaying beneath Naegi. He kept clinging tightly, hoping to ground his head. There was no way he could have killed Kamukura, there was no way he could have done this. Only somebody fucked up would do something like this, right? Somebody who needed serious mental help.  
  
Not Naegi Makoto. Not the normal teenage(?) boy with normal interests and hobbies, who just wants to make friends.

No way…  
  
Matsuda’s hand landed heavy on his shoulder, enough so to make him jump in terror.

“Oi, let it go.”

Naegi blinked hard, confused. He glanced down, only to find his hands tightly wrapped around one of Kamukura’s, wrists still tightly restrained, eyes still glossy and lifeless.

“Let go of the body, Naegi.” 

He shook his head. “N-No. He’s still alive. I-I’ll take care of him. It’s going to be okay. He’s okay. I’m okay.”

“This isn’t living. He’ll probably end up continuing to suffer until his organs fail. Let. Him. Go.”

Staying silent, Naegi only gripped Kamukura’s hand tighter.

Matsuda shoved Naegi to the side, surprisingly strong considering his pale complexion and skinny body. He yelped as he landed on his ass, looking up at Matsuda in anger. “H-hey!”

“He’s dead. Let. Go.”  
  
He moved so quickly, Naegi was barely able to watch him do it. He saw the flash of metal, a scalpel hidden in Matsuda's right hand lunging forward towards Kamukura's face. He didn't even have time to scream before a sickening crunch resounded throughout the room, and the scalpel was lodged right between Kamukura's eyes. 

His chest stopped moving, blood beginning to pour profusely from his head and dripping down his chin. Kamukura made no sound, red eyes still half lidded in boredom, as if he wasn't even shocked that things had turned out this way. 

Naegi vomited, heaving onto the floor as Matsuda watched his pathetic display. Tears pricked at his eyes as bile burned his throat, until there was nothing left but Naegi and the violent sobs that ripped through his body. 

"He's dead. He's been dead for a long time. You know this. He could never have been fixed." Speaking in a hushed, scathing tone, Matsuda let go of the scalpel. 

Blood had spurted onto the side of his face and his shirt, but he remained unbothered by it. He looked down at Kamukura one last time, then to Naegi, before heading towards the door. 

"No… please…" Sitting up on his knees, Naegi began to crawl towards Kamukura's body. "H-how could you just… Matsuda-kun I--"

"Don't call me that." Matsuda near snarled. "It won't be long before you join him. Especially now that you've snapped out of it."

Providing no further context on his words, he walked out, slamming the door behind him. Naegi was left completely alone with the body. 

Alone, with Kamukura. 

"Izuru…" He sobbed, reaching for Kamukura's pant leg. "Izuru I'm so sorry."

Naegi couldn't stomach the sight of Kamukura's mutilated corpse, but as he crawled his way into Kamukura's lap, he realised that didn't matter. Wrapping his arms tightly around Kamukura's waist, Naegi continued to weep.

He wept until there was nothing left of him, no tears, no hope, no despair. Just _nothing.  
  
  
_

**Author's Note:**

> -Matsuda refers to Kamukura and Naegi as "Becky and Lucy" this is a reference to the chimpanzees presented to the 1935 Congress by John Fulton and Carlyle Jacobson who had received had frontal lobectomies
> 
> -Future Foundation thinks Naegi is being held hostage by the remnants and used by them, abused by them. In reality it's Naegi using them to further fuel his need for despair.
> 
> Thankyou for reading
> 
> EDIT: My lovely friend Doki (the recipient of this fic) did some art for it ;;;; I implore you to check it out https://twitter.com/SlutShsl/status/1292367317729284096?s=19


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